Chasmar: Describe your occupation.
Crowder: I am a man of many trades, but what I really want to do is be a professional ice cream taster.
Chasmar: Steven, really?
Crowder: Fiiine, I am a FoxNews contributor and columnist, but at heart I'm a comedian. So whether that means stand-up, writing or television/film, at the end of the day I'm just a joke-monkey.
Chasmar: Describe yourself politically.
Crowder: My analogy is that of a hockey referee. The role of the government is to keep the players (in this case it's citizens) safe and make sure that people are playing by the rules. I believe in the Constitution, the founding documents, and their original intent as stated by those who founded them. In a nutshell, I don't argue with the men in knickers.
Chasmar: So would you consider yourself a libertarian?
Crowder: No. Bill Maher calls himself a libertarian so I don't even know what that means anymore. I would probably agree with most "libertarians" on 99 percent of the issues though. So many people have created sub-divisions of conservatism whether it's federalism, libertarianism etc. I just consider myself a conservative and feel no need to run from it.
Chasmar: What are the most important issues a promising 2012 candidate should focus on?
Crowder: Well obviously this is going to come down to the economy. I think the Republican candidate needs to be a conservative across the board, but if he's weak on the economy, we are screwed, blued and tattooed.
Chasmar: Does the Tea Party run the risk of splitting the conservative vote?
Crowder: I don't think so. Their role is to keep the Republican Party accountable to the principles that they're meant to uphold in the first place. If they're not doing that, then they're just a bunch of frustrated people in funny T-shirts.